Notes


Halloween Voting

This is it. This is the year I'm finally going to do it.

This is the Halloween, where if any kid comes to my door and says "Trick or Treat", I'm just going to turn my back to them for a moment. Then turn back around and flash them a long-finger illusion and say "Tada!"

Then, as they cowered away in sadness feeling robbed of candy I'll stare straight into their soul and say "Think about the words you just said. You have nothing to blame for the results here today except for your own ambivalence about the choices, and your own hubris to think that those who hold the candy bowls are going to act in your interests. If you wanted a treat, you should have just said 'Treat.' Now go vote on November 6th."


Clown Bathroom

I had a dream last night that I was visiting somewhere in the Southern US. I opened up a local entertainment guide and learned that the biggest local music act for the area was named "Clown Bathroom"


T-1000: Wine Mom

I had a dream last night that I was watching that scene in Terminator 2 where the T-1000 is preparing dinner for John Connor. Except in this version, once John figures out the scheme and doesn't show up, instead of knife-arming the dude drinking milk, the T-1000 gets emotionally unstable, starts bawling, pours a giant glass of wine and slams it while the Guns & Roses version of Live and Let Die plays.


MNtendo

I had a dream last night where I started some form of Nintendo community for only Minnesotans called MNtendo.


Last Check

Today I finally used my last check that has the address of the place that I lived at in 2009 on it.


T-1000's Younger Brother

I appreciate that if you are trying to remember who the lead singer of the band Filter is, Google makes sure to let you know that he is the T-1000's younger brother first and foremost.

Richard Patrick

Sex Porno

Whoever landed on my latest video by using the search term sex porno is going to have a bad time.

sex-porno.png

Fresh Portra vs Expired Portra

I found some sheets of 4x5 Portra 400 that had been unrefrigerated in a film holder since 2011. I Made the same exposure on it and on a fresh sheet. Here is the difference.


Drum Scanning Time Lapse

Here is a short time-lapse video of a drum scan I made last night.


Face of Chaos

For I have seen the face of chaos as I was at the Mesaba/Central Entrance intersection when the construction crew changed all the lights to blinking red. #dlh


Don't

"Nice Guy" & "Great Artist" Two things you should never self proclaim about yourself.


Unnecessary Panic

My favorite way to incite unnecessary panic in people is to just wait my turn behind them to use the one sink in the company breakroom.


Bug trapped in my film!

So one time I was scanning an 8x10 sheet of film and discovered that a mite or something was embedded into the film's emulsion.

Big trapped in film negative

presidents.net

I had a dream that I was elected president in 2020. Which came as a surprise as I wasn't even running for the position. But I knew it was real when I got moved into the White House and was told to register an account at presidents.net on the old White House dial up computer.


Vintage Meme

Back in my day we only had one "meme" and it was "Mr. T ate my balls" and that was the way we liked it dagnabit!


Meat Tube

I just had a thought about how vocals in music are basically a meat-tube wind instrument and now my life is jacked.


Large Format Farthing

I like when people learn that I use a large format camera and then proceed to say I use a box camera. Kind of like finding out a bicycle racer uses a modern carbon fiber bike and then telling all your friends that they won their last race riding a penny-farthing.


Fine Art

Maybe 2018 should be the year I try to make Fine Art Dick Pics a thing?


Photo Credits

My favorite part about allowing blogs to use my photographs with attribution is when they inevitably skip the part where I request for my name to be linked to my website in the attribution. Its like if they actually offered payment, and then handed over Monopoly money.


Cloves

So about the cloves label in this magnetic spice tin set I bought...

Cloves

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